Thesis Pieces

Write a focused essay in seconds.

If you’re anything like I was as a freshman, you probably still rely heavily on the five-paragraph essay format of writing papers. You know, the one that looks like this:

I. Introduction (with three-prong thesis as last sentence)
II. Body I (with first point/claim of three-prong thesis)
III. Body II (with second point/claim of three-prong thesis)
IV. Body III (with third point/claim of three-prong thesis)
V. Conclusion (restated thesis as first sentence)

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with writing essays this way. The reason we were taught this format is because it is the standard for essay writing and is a great tool for beginning writers. However, the thesis that claims three separate things about the essay topic, that you separate into body paragraphs, really doesn't manage to say much at all. It worked for high school, sure. But, in college and beyond, if you want to write a well-developed, scholarly paper, you need a specific, focused thesis. This tutorial can help you create one every time so you can compose excellent pieces that you are proud of.

For those still scratching their heads about what on earth a three-prong thesis is, I’ll offer an example and explanation. A three-prong thesis is a little like this:

Pavich’s flashbacks give the reader an understanding of Sarah’s situation during the course of the story based on memories while still creating intensity within the present scenes through effective use of timing, irony, and scene choice.

This isn’t a great thesis. And it shouldn’t be. I wrote this in high school, and I cringe every time I look at it. Do I know what I was talking about? Maybe, but that isn't clear based on this thesis.

Notice that the position is clearly defined here: that the author’s use of flashbacks reveals character and more of the plot tension (like, you know, flashbacks are supposed to by definition) and therefore have reason to be part of the story. That doesn't say much of anything about the substance of my argument. In fact, what I am trying to argue is not debatable because I inadvertently use the definition of flashback to argue the purpose of a flashback in this short story.

“Three-prong” refers to the tail end of the sentence: effective use of timing, irony, and scene choice. Those are the three claims I would make throughout the essay’s body paragraphs and what I would focus on as evidence of the effective use of flashbacks.

This is a bad thesis. As a more experienced and skilled writer, I would never turn this in today for an assignment or professionally.

However, there is a place for a thesis like this one. My suggestion is to begin your writing with a bad version of your thesis, something just like this one.

Why?

It helps you focus. You may begin with a topic idea in mind, or this may be assigned to you based on the class you take. Maybe you want to write about the H1N1 flu, or the ways an understanding of statistics can help students become better writers. Whatever the topic, you likely start with that idea before you dive into research.

If you write a poor version of your thesis, one that you are aware is not good, you give yourself a more specific idea of what kind of articles and books to look for as you research.

As a student, you may still struggle with the idea of creating an effective thesis statement. There are some ways to determine if a thesis statement is strong enough. Generally, if a thesis statement is vague, broad, and/or not up for debate, it could be improved upon.

Some examples of bad thesis statements include the following:

“The North and South fought the Civil War for many reasons, some of which were the same and some different” (The Writing Center at UNC).

• Vague: “Many reasons,” and “some of which were the same and some different” do not tell us specifically what the author will argue.

• Broad: It is too broad for a student to try and tackle all the reasons for fighting in the Civil War and their contexts and complexities.

• Not debatable: This statement does not provide a debatable argument. During armed conflict, opposing sides invariably fight for many similar and different reasons. That cannot be argued because there is no opposing position.

“Drug use is bad for society.”

• Vague: What kind of drugs is the author talking about? Illicit drugs? Prescription drugs? Generally acceptable drugs like tobacco, alcohol, and caffeine? How does the author define “bad” in this context? And what do they mean by “society?”

• Broad: This statement implies the author will talk about all drugs having negative effects on all societies, which is far too much to cover well in one paper.

• Not debatable: The word “drug” immediately comes with a negative connotation, as does the word “bad,” which leaves little room for debate. Most everyone opposes some substance.

“Nuclear war is bad and should be avoided at all cost.”

• Vague: Does nuclear war refer to a war fought exclusively with nuclear weapons? Partially with nuclear weapons? Is the potential for nuclear winter considered here too? How does the author define “bad” in this context? Does the author really mean “avoided at all costs,” even the significant cost of human lives?

• Broad: An author likely cannot cover all the scenarios for nuclear war, all the reasons nuclear war is bad, and all the reasons and scenarios in which it should be avoided.

• Not debatable: Many people oppose war, and most everyone understands the consequences of total nuclear conflict: mass death and the possible extinction of the human race. That it should probably be avoided or used as a last resort isn’t exactly up for debate

Once you start to comb through the research and learn new information, you should expand and adjust the thesis to better reflect what you want to argue and how you want to argue it. This is called a working thesis, and researchers often expect this kind of thesis to change. Some examples of a working thesis are listed below:

“While both sides fought the Civil War over the issue of slavery, the North fought for moral reasons while the South fought to preserve its own institutions” (The Writing Center at UNC).

• Good: This thesis begins to take shape, outlining the similarities and differences of the North’s and South’s goals hinted at in the first statement

• Needs improvement: It still does not explain “moral reasons” and “own institutions.” “The issue of slavery” is also still somewhat vague/broad.

“Doctors’ tendencies to over-prescribe opiates are bad for society because they lead to addiction.”

• Good: This thesis provides a specific kind of drug (prescription opiates) and a perceived cause-and-effect relationship that gives the reader a better idea of what the argument is and why the author believes his or her side to be true.

• Needs improvement: The author still does not define “bad” and “society.” He or she also introduces a new problem: is leading to addiction the most pressing issue about opiate prescriptions, or is that merely a step leading to the real trouble, the potential for overdoses and loss of life?

“All world governments should agree to dismantle their nuclear weapons on moral and humanitarian grounds.”

• Good: This thesis statement presents a debatable argument and asserts the author’s position, proposed solution, and reasoning.

• Needs improvement: The premise is a bit unreasonable, as it would be difficult if not impossible to get all world governments to agree to anything, especially something drastic like dismantling nuclear weapons where there is no guarantee terrorists or dictatorships would abide by such an agreement. Additionally, “moral and humanitarian grounds” is vague and can mean different things to different people.

Often, your papers will take a different direction than the one you start with, and you will end up arguing something separate from your original working thesis. Rather than changing the whole paper to conform with the thesis statement, simply change the thesis statement to reflect what you have written. These are good thesis statements. Some examples appear below:

“While both Northerners and Southerners believed they fought against tyranny and oppression, Northerners focused on the oppression of slaves while Southerners defended their own right to self-government” (The Writing Center at UNC).

• This thesis addresses a specific facet of the motivations for fighting the Civil war (a fight against tyranny and oppression) and explains the two opposing perspectives of what constituted tyranny and oppression for each side.

• All terms from the last two iterations have been defined (such as “own interests” becoming “own right to self government”).

• This is also debatable, as there can be argument about the North’s and South’s true motives.

“To address the costliness of the American opioid crisis, local governments and health officials should set up safe injection sites nationwide and make Narcan widely available in public places to save taxpayer money, curb addiction stigmatization, and protect and preserve human lives.”

• This thesis statement has shifted quite a bit from its original iteration, “Drugs are bad.” Instead, it poses a narrower, more specific argument in problem-solution format.

• The author takes a controversial, debatable stance (setting up safe injection sites and expanding distribution of Narcan) and provides reasons their stance is valid.

• It specifies a society (American society) and explains “bad” (costs money and lives, stigmatizes addiction).

“While total global de-nuclearization may not be achievable, governments should strive to limit their nuclear arsenals, as the threat of mutually-assured destruction contributes to the global climate of fear and uncertainty that has led to xenophobia, intense nationalism, religious discrimination, and governments’ violations of their citizens’ privacy.”

• This thesis takes the middle ground approach to another controversial argument.

• The author acknowledges the inability to achieve global de-nuclearization but proposes a more moderate solution (limiting nuclear arsenals) and suggests psychological effects of a constant threat of nuclear war.

• It defines four areas of “bad,” all related to feelings of fear and unease, that the author can discuss through the specific lens of “threat of nuclear annihilation.”

Thesis statements serve as a starting point and launchpad for your paper, and as an endpoint. It should be the first and last thing you work on when you draft your papers.

A thesis is the guide to any written work. It is an argumentative position statement that clearly defines purpose. In research papers and essays, it is usually stated at the end of the introduction. In academic articles, it usually appears as the last few sentences of a one or two paragraph introduction. In stories, it is usually not present until the very end and is often implied rather than directly stated.

With this in mind as a guide, you should find that your essays feel more mature, deeper, and more insightful than what you wrote for your high school English class. The guiding pieces of a decent thesis are as follows:

• Clarity

• Conciseness

• Summary of argument

• Summary of position taken

• Open-endedness

• Specificity

Keep practicing your thesis statements. You may find in your practice the true nature of your idea and the best way to articulate it. Remember, the stronger and more specific the thesis, the more cohesive and focused your paper will be.

Have questions or other advice about thesis statements? Be sure to share in the comments below.